I've invoked a few divinities, with varying success. I've created a handful of servitors that more often than not did what they were told. I have never summoned anything, deliberately. I have never attempted to contact an intelligence or other entity, at least not consciously.


During a meditation session on Wednesday May 25, I became aware of the presence of two entities. My meditations tend to be uneventful, mindfulness sessions; sometimes there is magic involved, energy work or sigil casting. My meditations do not often contain visuals unless I am deliberately focused on something.  About 10 minutes into my meditation, I realized I was seeing something.  I had not recognized that the meditation had taken on a unique quality until that point, but as I became aware of the visual, I realized that my consciousness was distinctly altered: it felt slightly hallucinatory, slightly like a dream state, but not quite either, exactly. (I was under the influence of no substances other than frankincense)

As I became aware of the shape I was seeing, my mind attempted to control the shape, to interpret it. I did not want that to happen. I did not want my mind in the way. I know from experience that surest way to end an event is to allow the mind to shape it or try to interpret it while it is happening. I was able to disengage from the act of interpreting what I was seeing. The event continued, but its progression is hazy in my memory.

The next thing that I recall is two dancing lights.  That's the best description I can come up with.  One was blue, I think the other was pink.  They danced in place: flashing, swirling, vibrating. After a bit, I realize that they were conversing. I have the distinct impression that they were talking to each other, and that they were talking about me.  They may have addressed me directly. By the time I recognized this conversation, however, my mind got in the way again and attempted to "listen". I was not successful in disengaging a second time and the event ended shortly thereafter.

I ended the meditation at that point. I was intrigued, but did not attempt to further interpret until the next day. It was at that point, on the morning of May 26, that I pieced together the experience as best I could.

I'm not as good as I used to be at "going with the flow", which is why I don't indulge in substances much anymore. I need to work on that.

My meditation on the night on of Thursday, May 26, was similar, but much more direct. After about 10 minutes, there were discrete visuals; for the first time ever, I felt like I was seeing "somewhere else". The initial moments of the experience are unclear. They may have been proceeded by bursts of color. I know there was some dialogue, there may been more than one speaker. The event coalesced into my experience of a presence: it was female, it was aquatic in nature (I experienced fins, possibly gills, an amphibian like skin); it was shackled, I clearly saw shackles and chains. She spoke to me, but again, the initial dialogue is unclear.

But then she quite clearly said to me: "Motorhands up there says it won't work."

And my attention followed the chains that bound her to a shadowed area where there was clearly another presence that seemed to be holding the shackles. Though I sensed no menace... it was an odd turn of events.

The event ended at this point in another (?) burst of colors. I was left with some post-event flashes of colors and more dancing lights, though they did not communicate this time.  It seemed more like after-effects, like the residual affects of a hallucinogen after peaking.

I ended the meditation shortly thereafter and immediately wrote down the sentence that was spoken to me. I'm no closer to grasping its meaning.